It’s the world of prostitution. You never know what you’re gonna...– Lawrence Taylor, Hall of Fame poonhound
I really hope Adam Richman stole Guy Fieri’s Lamborghini
Rachael Harris was in Archer tonight. That’s why I looked this up. And no other reason, I swear.
RT @anthonyjeselnik: Sorry I’ve been away for a white. I had to “take care of” my grandmother.
me: what are you gonna do tonight then?
Jon: probably just sit at home
me: oh, heat gonna break the streak
i wouldnt be surprised
it will probably be a close game
and come down to kobe and lebron missing a bunch of contested shots down the stretch
me: ha, NBA fever! catch it.
Jon: nba fever?
i've got nba full blown AIDS
me: you're the magic johnson of NBA fans
lazy jokes FTW!
Jon: i prefer to think of myself as the everyone in Africa of NBA fans
This is delightful, even if it seems like a long Denny’s commercial.
Old people are the new dumb people. thedailywhat: Old People Post of the Day: Above: Republican Alan Simpson, co-chairman of President Obama’s deficit commission and stereotypical old person, took a short break from supposedly trying to keep the US around for future generations to tell America’s youth to get off his lawn with their low-hanging pants, and their backwards cap, and their Enema Man...
YOU GUYS, RODNEY DANGERFIELD IS ALIVE! oldjewstellingjokes: Bernie Leibowitz, “Viagra” Bernie Leibowitz was raised in Philadelphia and is the youngest of seven children.
iheartchaos: Awesome short film of the day: “Multiple Choice” I don’t know when the addiction started for me, sometime before the move to tumblr, but I can’t go a day without IHC. I’ve got my fingers crossed that you’ll dig my short film “Multiple Choice”. Ever tell a lie to get out of taking a test? Ever beat the shit out of your friends to support the lie? Here’s your cautionary tale.
The 'eens have it
With Charlie Sheen melting down and Paula Deen riding things all day on the internet, what can ESPN NBA announcer Mike Breen possibly do to keep the pattern intact?
paula deen riding things →
Charlie Sheen Soundboard →
sexism is the best ism
me: that guy you know at panasonic isn't looking to make you a VP?
Jeff: the girl
me: oh, well then obviously she has no say in the matter
Jeff: i lol'd
because the idea of women in power is humorous to me
Jeff: "just be quiet and go have your period somewhere else"
Live the sheen dream →
Thank god this is in my life. Props to Ali for the submission.